Yesterday, deep in the middle of a coaching call, I asked “What do you really want to focus on in your leadership sessions? What would make a difference to your leadership this year as we work together? What is it about leadership that fascinates you?” The answer was. “I want to learn everything I can about leadership from you. I need to understand what leadership is and I want to know the theory behind it.” I took a deep breath! This was sounding like the goals of a Uni degree. I spend my days, and in fact have spent my life, learning, leading stumbling, understanding, reflecting and teaching, coaching, consulting and advising about leadership with people one on one to whole of industry. Right at that very moment, the idea of learning and “doing” leadership flashed through my thinking. Theory versus practice, understanding versus application, thinking versus feeling and judging versus empowering. The rest of our conversation went on to be about the purpose of leadership in the everyday, how it can be learned, the constructs of transactional and transformational and positional leadership versus influential leadership. I love the everyday application of leadership – the things we can do right away.
My challenge, as trusted coach, is to make the time in our coaching sessions useful and most of all transformative. To act as a resource and introduce just in time information, constructs, stories, questions and of course some theory too to generate enough interest to support you to “do” leadership and to act, implement, try, stumble and put in place a change – no matter how small – to grow and enhance your leadership. No amount of leadership theory on its own is going to get you to this point but some carefully crafted questions that generate an understanding of leadership and how it plays out in your everyday life and work will. I can say this with confidence as it’s played out to be true time and time again in the leadership and coaching programs I and many of my colleagues facilitate.
Making leadership relevant to the everyday is the focus of these newsies. This issue is all about how to lead with heart. And here are some ways to do just that. No Uni degree needed, no 3 day workshop, no 40 page workbook, just some things that you can consciously do with commitment that are certain to make a change. You’ll know as people will relate to you in a different way. Watch out for it. Would love to know which of these make sense for you right now (if any) too.
Be 100% present – show up with focus on others.
Bring 100% focus to conversations – listen, listen, listen and then talk.
Listen deeply – listen first to understand and only then to be understood.
Speak with integrity – say what you mean and be clear about it. Luv the quote from Brene Brown. “Clear is kind, unclear is unkind.”
Work ‘with’ people – talk and work ‘with’ people rather than doing things ‘to’ or ‘for’ people. This one is about respect and shared power.
Be a role model – walk the talk.
Ask of yourself what you ask of others – this gives we are in this together vibe.
Be kind – acts of kindness are easily noticed. It can be as simple as saying “you did a great job today” as you walk past a team member.
Tell the truth – say no more – there is no room for lies in leadership.
Show empathy – this is about connecting with emotions. A great place to start is to show you recognise the emotions of others.
Over to You
Do any of these resonate for you? Could any be helpful in your work / relationships today?
