Last Newsy I wrote about boundaries. Today, it’s important to really exercise your boundaries so you see the glass as half full (and not half empty). This will see you take time to identify what you can control and what you can’t and to focus on the things you can. And then to put your energy towards these things and not towards the things you can’t control. This is a really positive way to implement your boundaries and to ensure you give yourself the best chance of not becoming overwhelmed by the things you can’t control. Here’s a reminder….

I hear you – this is all very well and good when you are feeling on top of things, and so very much harder when you’re not. I find it a challenge scrolling through social media and seeing posts about things that can’t be controlled. I wonder how many people absorb this. Right now, it’s important to put your mindset into the hope and optimism gear!

“The best leaders tap the optimism of their teams. They strengthen confidence, broaden perspective, and remind people that the future can be better, and that we can help build it together. In uncertain times, people look to leaders for optimism and for a clear vision of the future.

That is why realistic and infectious optimism matters so much in leadership. The infectiously optimistic leader does more than set strategy. They lift the team’s spirits. They bring steadiness in difficulty, confidence in uncertainty, and energy for the work ahead. They help others believe that progress is possible and that their contribution matters.” 
– Victor Perton. The Centre for Optimism

Here are some practical tips for moving into the gear of optimism…..

1. In Your Control / Out of Your Control. Remind yourself and others – especially those in your teams about what’s in your control and what isn’t.

2. Don’t Buy In. Scan your social media ,online news, newspaper and TV news reports using the In Your Control and Out of Your Control radar. Give more time to what’s in rather than what’s out of your control.

3. Redirect Your Thinking / Energy. We all have off moments / times. Take extra care to recognise when you become fixated on things you can’t control and remember to move your mindset into the gear of optimism. Put your energy into the things that you can influence.

4. Be Consistent. You will know when you’re becoming overwhelmed by what you are seeing and hearing – especially on social media and in the news. As soon as this happens remind yourself of and turn your energy to what you can control.

5. Radiate the Energy of Optimism. Tap into your own as well as the optimism of your team. Lift your spirits and bring confidence in uncertainty.

Over to You

Do any of these resonate for you? Could any be helpful in your work / relationships today?

The post Dial Up Your Optimism Today appeared first on Ruralscope.

Setting and exercising boundaries is critical for maintaining healthy relationships, protecting your mental wellbeing, and creating a balanced life. To be honest, given the mental loads people carry these days, I wonder what or how effective the boundaries are that people set. So what exactly is a boundary?

“Boundaries are the limits you set to define what you are comfortable with and how you expect others to treat you.”

Without clear boundaries, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, taken advantage of (which I know leads to resentment or as we call it in our family the Capital R), or emotionally drained. Learning to establish and maintain boundaries is a powerful form of self-respect. This extends from respect for yourself to your work / job, business, family, community etc. Yep, it’s boundaries all round.

One of the key reasons boundaries matter is that they help preserve your energy. When you constantly say “yes” to others without considering your own needs, it can lead to the Capital R as well as burnout.

“Boundaries allow you to prioritise what truly matters. This ensures your time and energy are spent in ways that align with your values.”

Boundaries improve relationships because when you clearly communicate what’s OK and what’s not OK to others it fosters trust and respect. People know where they stand. If you don’t set and exercise your boundaries – physical, emotional, mental and material it’s highly likely frustrations and misunderstandings will build up. This can then lead to tension, conflict and even a breakdown of the relationship. Boundaries help to maintain self respect.

Here are some practical tips for setting effective boundaries…….

1. Know what’s OK and what’s not OK for you. Set your limits. This extends from what time you start / finish work, to how long phone calls are or even if you take a call, how many times a day you check your emails or social media or when / if you lend family / friends money. Some people refer to them as your “rules”.

2. Availability to others. Have you noticed how easy it is for people to ask you for or to do something and how difficult it can be to say “NO”? Have some one-liners up your sleeve to help like “I can’t be in Queensland on that date” “I’m not available for that right now” “I’m leaving at 10 am”. Value your own wellbeing by saying NO.

3. Emotional availability to others. Support others without taking on their emotional load. I find this important when coaching and facilitating. Knowing I’m not responsible for other people’s happiness has been a game changer for me.

4. Be consistent. You will know when your boundaries are being tested. Be consistent. Consistency reinforces what’s OK and what’s not OK for you and shows that you are serious about them. People will get the message if you maintain consistency and you will maintain your boundary = happiness.

5. Habits and rituals. I use habits and rituals to maintain boundaries, and especially so when travelling. This includes a stash of my own herbal tea bags, taking my morning greens, heading to bed around 10 pm, setting agendas for the following day the night before, completing a mental SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats) scan after each meeting / facilitation and reading a couple of chapters of a good book before lights out.

Over to You

Do any of these resonate for you? Could any be helpful in your work / relationships today?

The post Boundaries are a No Brainer! appeared first on Ruralscope.

2 Questions

As the New Year rolls around, take a few minutes to disrupt the flow and reset ready for your best year yet. Ask yourself the following questions.

Question 1

What worked well last year and what am I really proud of?

Question 2

What are the 2 key things I’m going to “do” and who am I going to “be” in this New Year?

There’s no hard and fast process here. You can read the questions and go through the answers in your head. You can take a note book (paper or electronic) and jot down the questions and answers and then turn them into a plan. You can then refer to them during the year and see how things are going. Or you can sit on the verandah and chat with someone you choose and see what comes up for both of you. You can then see what to take forward for you and as a shared intention. Lots of people tell us they have found the verandah option a game changer.

12 Questions

If you’re looking for more of a deep dive to disrupt and reset ready for your New Year, then these 12 questions are a must. I don’t recommend you go through these questions in your head. I think it best that you grab a note book (paper or electronic) and jot down the answers and then turn them into a plan. And I strongly encourage you to share and talk about these with others. This way you can also support and hold each other accountable too. 

Question 1

What are my achievements from last year?

Question 2

What set backs did I overcome to achieve these?

Question 3

What did I produce last year?

Question 4

How did I positively impact others – in my family, my team, my workplace, my community or my industry?

Question 5

What new knowledge and skills did I gain?

Question 6

What could I have done differently across the year?

Question 7

What do I need to “let be” or “let go of” and not take into the New Year?

Question 8

What do I want / need to focus on in the New Year?

Question 9

Who do I want to “be” in the New Year?

Question 10

What are my key goals for the New Year and how will I know when I achieve them?

Question 11

How will you monitor the year ahead and take time out to recalibrate and celebrate your achievements on the go?

Question 12

What will the year ahead look like and how will you feel at the end of the year?

Over to You

Do you think the 2 or 12 questions suit you best? Will you think about the questions in your head? Jot them down – paper or electronically or take some time out with someone else and chat them through and create individual as well as shared intentions? Whichever you choose, remember it’s up to you to develop and implement a plan for your New Year. Many people tell us that even a small amount of thinking and planning creates clarity and confidence for their New Year. I want the same for you. Good luck. And please feel free to reach out to me here if you think I can help in any way.

Until next time!

The post Kick Off Your New Year With These 2 or 12 Questions appeared first on Ruralscope.